Poll Results, KAGIs & Judo RPGs

Let’s sum up the results of the poll “Would you spend the equivalent of 20 Big Macs on a game like Blue Flow?”

The results were unanimous, with all 3 votes going to “What’s the point of having a poll when this blog has only a readership of 2?” This blog is not haunted by the spirit of Tsukimiya Ayu or any other Key Astral-projection GIrl (KAGI). Now you know why they have KAGIs in almost every Key game. It wouldn’t be a KEY game without the KAGI. But I digress.

I voted twice accidentally.

And I’ll tell you what the point of having a poll is.

It’s for me to gain blogging EXP.

I realized drawing analogies to RPGs can be a great motivational tool. If I can spend 99h 99m 99s to grind to Lvl99, imagine what I could have achieved if all that effort was applied to other endeavors.

My old judo coach used to motivate his players with FF analogies. (He’s an FF fan.) He would say “You’ll level up and get stronger by fighting monsters right? The tougher the monster the more EXP right? It’s the same for judo, so go spar with the strongest opponents you can find.”

I had wanted to point out that in FF VIII it’s much better to keep your levels low as the monsters scale up as you level. And the stat gain from levels is abysmal compared to junctioning. Moral of the story? Get a GF.

Or a wife. Or a mistress. Or a life partner. Preferably someone like this:

What happens when you junction Rinoa to Quistis? The doujin would make quite an interesting read.

Anyway, I found that FF analogy rather exciting and enjoyed judo training a bit more, though I did get the Game Over screen countless times. And I broke quite a few limbs with my Limit Break, most of which belonged to me. I’d call home to tell my folks I’m at the emergency department getting a dose of Phoenix Down and the response would be “Again?”. If you’re interested, the sound of an ulnar snapping is rather similar to that made by a snapping twig. The ulnar didn’t belong to me btw.

One more reason judo plays like FF VIII is that your opponents do scale up as you level. Players are categorized by belt level in Kyu Grade Tournaments, so you’d supposedly meet opponents of the same skill. But as most of us quickly found out, belt levels in judo can be as deceptive as character levels in FF VIII. I think belt levels are more a reflection of a player’s knowledge of judo rather than his fighting ability, which is largely determined by strength, reflexes, fighting experience and mental grit. A skilled judoka can always remain a white belt if he refuses to pay the Judo Federation 20 bucks for each grading exam.

In other words, high belt levels are a risk factor for powerful skills but there is no direct causal relationship. The absence of high belt levels cannot exclude the possibility of powerful skills. History and direct examination remain the gold standard in diagnosis of the condition. Once diagnosed, it is recommended that the condition be managed by a multidisciplinary team of players and coaches as the presentation varies widely among patients and there is no standard treatment. Praying for a rampaging taxi driver to come tearing down the street whenever the patient crosses the road is ethically controversial, and although plausible logically, is unsupported by clinical evidence.

And I think my coach was secretly enjoying a game of real life Pokemon with the team.

“ZeoiNagePotato!! I CHOOSE YOU!!!”

This is not me. This is Yawara. She is voiced by Akiko-san.

This is not me either. This is Ryoko. She is voiced by herself.

I’m putting up a new poll.

Would you like a GF who’s strong in groundwork? Do you have a secret desire to be pinned down, choked and arm-locked?

Vote away, I need the EXP.